What are some
Funny Christmas Jokes
How many gifts can Santa squeeze in an empty stocking? One. It’s not empty after the first one.
There will be no Christmas anymore. I told Santa that you have been good for the whole year. He died of laughter.
Funny how the year you stop believing in Santa is roughly the year you start getting socks and clothes for Christmas.
Another helicopter tried to land in our garden today. I think we’re going to have to reduce our Christmas lights a bit.
Also, enjoy this –
Lisa thanks her grandpa, “Thank you Grandpa for the violin you gave me last year for Christmas. I’ve never got such a brilliant gift!”
“Really?” asks the surprised Grandpa.
Lisa says, “Oh yeah – every time I start playing, mom gives me 2 dollars so I would stop!”
What kind of a bike does Santa ride in his spare time? A Holly Davidson.
An honest politician, a hard-working civil servant, and Santa Claus find a 100 dollar bill. Who gets to keep it?
Santa does, the other two are creatures of myth and legend.
Two women are chatting, “I took my husband to the Christmas market yesterday,” says one of them.
“And, did someone want to buy him?” asks the other.
Christmas What Do You Call Jokes
John: What did the gingerbread man put on his bed?
John: A cookie sheet.
Ben: What did the peanut butter say to the grape on Christmas?
Jack: I don’t know.
Ben: “‘Tis the season to be jelly.”
Isaac: What is the Grinch’s favorite holiday?
Anthony: I don’t know.
Jeremy: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
Brian: I’m stumped.
Peter: Someone must be mad at Frosty the Snowman.
Peter: Because they gave him two black eyes.
Christmas Holiday Jokes for Kids
What is a cow’s favorite holiday?
What does Santa suffer from whenever he gets stuck in a chimney?
How do sheep wish each other happy holidays?
Merry Christmas to ewe.
What is an elf’s favorite sport?
What does Mrs. Claus say to Santa when there are clouds in the sky?
It looks like rain, deer.
What do snowmen take when the sun gets too hot?
A chill pill.
What should you give your parents at Christmas?
A list of what you want.
What did the gingerbread man put under his blankets?
A cookie sheet.
Who delivers Christmas presents to elephants?
How does Rudolph know when Christmas is coming?
He refers to his calen-deer.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
What do you call a greedy elf?
One turkey asks another, “Do you believe in life after Christmas?”
Sending letters to Santa up the chimney is definitely blackmail.
What did the reindeer say when he was spotted on Christmas Eve by Little Johnny?
Nothing, reindeers don’t talk.
Christmas Jokes That makes you laugh – Christmas Fun
This will be the fifth year in a row that my in-laws will come over for Christmas. I think this time we should let them in.
I heard some strange chatter from the spice cupboard mid-December. But it was just the Season’s greetings.
What is invisible and smells like milk and cookies? Santa’s burps.
What is invisible and does NOT smell like milk and cookies? Santa’s farts.
Christmas Knock Knock Jokes For Kids
What’s another name for Santa’s Little Helpers? – Subordinate clauses.
Olive Christmastime, don’t you?
Gladys Christmas. You too?
Wow, you’re really excited about Christmas!
Santa Christmas card to you. Did you get it?
Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!
Lettuce in for cocoa and Christmas cookies.
Snow one’s at the door.
Yule know when you answer the door.
Elf I knock again will you let me in?
Centipede on the Christmas tree!
Irish you a Merry Christmas!
Ho Ho who?
Your Santa impression needs a little work!
For more Christmas jokes like this comment down below.